Christmas Buyers Guide 2022
Posted by JOE SWEENEY
You’ve made your list and you’ve checked it twice. Now you’re ready to start checking gifts off your list, so you can relax with a spiked eggnog and a plateful of Christmas cookies. Good thing we’re here to help with your holiday gift procurement. No matter who is on your list, we’ve got the perfect gift suggestions for all the true American patriots in your life. Whether you’re shopping for the person who has everything or you are looking for a gift to make your first Christmas together extra special, we’ve got you covered with answers to your top gift giving questions. Without further ado, we’d like to present the Patriot’s Cave 2022 Holiday Shopping Guide.
Q: Do you have any suggestions regarding Christmas gifts for patriots?
A: Why, of course we do. What do patriots want more than anything? That’s right, they want a new president. And everyone who wants a new president really wants a glass or a shirt with that message. Good thing we have both:
Q: Can you help me with some unique gift ideas?
A: We’d love to. If you are shopping for an outspoken patriot who says the things that everyone is thinking, may we suggest our I’m Not Rude glass:
https://patriotscave.com/products/im-not-rude-whiskey-glass?_pos=30&_sid=56a8908bb&_ss=r
Are you shopping for a friend who loves freedom and knows that socialism has never worked? They will definitely appreciate our Smokey the Bear – Only You can Prevent Socialism glass:
Do you need a gift for someone who hates Biden, and makes a beeline for the coffeemaker in the morning? Get them a mug that will support both support their need for rapid morning caffeination and their distain for the bumbling president:
https://patriotscave.com/products/nordic-mug-buck-fiden?_pos=19&_sid=5a59610e9&_ss=r
Q: What are some good Christmas gift ideas by age?
A: Sound like you are shopping for someone in a particular age group. If you are looking for something for your Trump loving grandparents, we’ve got the perfect glasses for your Meemaw and Pop-pop. They’ll enjoy sipping grand pappy’s medicine from these. Even Mr. and Mrs. Claus use them.
https://patriotscave.com/products/308-bullet-whiskey-glass-grandmas-for-trump?variant=42416890216599
Q: What can I gift someone for Christmas?
A: You can gift someone a gift set. Gift sets are Christmas gifting 101, as they contain a variety of items that adhere to a theme. Make it easy on yourself, grab a few gift sets, and then make a big hot chocolate and watch your favorite Christmas movie, since you’ll be done with your shopping early.
https://patriotscave.com/products/fjb-gift-set?_pos=1&_sid=f43fdc855&_ss=r
https://patriotscave.com/products/pee-on-biden-gift-set?_pos=4&_sid=f43fdc855&_ss=r
https://patriotscave.com/products/lets-go-brandon-gift-set?_pos=6&_sid=f43fdc855&_ss=r
Q: What should I get my teenagers for Christmas?
A: We know you raised your kids right, so get them some glasses that say just that. When the reindeer were finished playing their reindeer games, their parents all got them these glasses.
https://patriotscave.com/products/308-bullet-whiskey-glass-raised-right?_pos=2&_sid=59451aa61&_ss=r
Q: What should I get my teenage girl for Christmas? What are some inexpensive gifts for a teenage girl?
A: Since she’s a Trump girl, get her something cute to wear:
https://patriotscave.com/products/im-a-trump-girl-get-over-it-t-shirt?variant=42310884163735
She’ll also love this Girls for Trump glass:
https://patriotscave.com/products/308-bullet-whiskey-glass-girls-for-trump?variant=42416877731991
Q: Is it OK to give cash for Christmas?
A: Yes, it’s ok, but it’s just ok. We think a better idea is to give a gift that might help the recipient collect the money that is owed to them by Biden voters. Our Whoever Voted for Biden Owes Me Gas Money glass says it all. Ebenezer Scrooge especially likes this glass, he voted for Trump and he wants his gas money repaid with interest.
Q: What gifts are trending?
A: So glad you asked, here are some of our most popular items. These are so popular in fact, that we just received a large order from the North Pole…it seems that a lot of people will be receiving these for Christmas.
https://patriotscave.com/products/biden-crash-bikes-and-economies-glass
https://patriotscave.com/products/our-founders-warned-us-quote-glass
Q: What is the 5 gift rule for Christmas? What is the five gift rule? What about the 10 gift rule for Christmas?
A: The 5 gift rule involves gifting a person 5 presents, one from each of the categories below. We’ve included helpful suggestions with each category.
- Something they want: This gift set is really funny, everyone wants one. https://patriotscave.com/products/pee-on-biden-gift-set
- Something they need: They need to keep the sun out of their eyes, so this hat is perfect. https://patriotscave.com/products/lets-go-brandon-hat-1?variant=41799722074263
- Something to wear: This is one of our most popular shirt designs. https://patriotscave.com/products/traitors-and-patriots-shirt?variant=42295664869527
- Something to read: Every time they look out their window, they can read the Second Amendment. https://patriotscave.com/products/copy-of-thin-blue-line-3-x-5-flag
- Something to do: Drinking is one of the best, most fun things to do. https://patriotscave.com/products/draped-flag-etched-decanter-set
The 10 gift rule just adds five additional gifts to the 5 gift rule:
- Something to be used: They will be thrilled to use this bottle opener each time they crack open a cold one. https://patriotscave.com/products/50-cal-bottle-opener-buy-american-hire-american
- Something made: Since they are an American citizen, they can celebrate that they were made in America with every sip from this glass. https://patriotscave.com/products/made-in-america-glass?_pos=57&_sid=591ff3f09&_ss=r
- Something for the family: Their entire family will appreciate drinking their beverage of choice from this Faith, Family, Freedom glass. https://patriotscave.com/products/faith-family-freedom-heart-and-cross-glass?_pos=29&_sid=591ff3f09&_ss=r
- Something played: This glass will let liberals know not to play with them. The bullet embedded in the side really drives that point home. https://patriotscave.com/products/308-bullet-whiskey-glass-warning-doesnt-play-well-with-liberals?_pos=841&_sid=591ff3f09&_ss=r
- Something for me: This is supposed to be a memento or a special keepsake, but at this point you’ve already gotten them nine presents, so you should definitely pick up a little something for yourself. Because you’re a patriot, this little something is perfect for you. https://patriotscave.com/products/flag-pin
Q: What is a good 1st gift for my girlfriend? What is a memorable gift for girlfriend? What is a unique gift for girlfriend? What are some thoughtful gifts for girlfriend?
A: Awww, it’s your first Christmas as a couple and you want to make it special. That’s so sweet. Since your girl is a Conservative cutie, get her what we think is the best simple gift for a girlfriend: something cute that shows she’s a Conservative. She’ll appreciate how thoughtful you are and will love this unique and memorable gift. Just between us, this is what Santa is getting for the Mrs.
https://patriotscave.com/products/lady-elephant-shirt?variant=42434160394391
Q: What are some meaningful gifts for him?
A: Since he means business about his guns, might we suggest this glass: https://patriotscave.com/products/pint-glass-1776-sure-no-one-is-taking-my-gun?_pos=15&_sid=fbb2abf34&_ss=r
And just be sure that your gift to him is on target, why not also get him this: https://patriotscave.com/products/come-and-take-it-you-sleepy-asshole-6x4-oval-magnet?_pos=75&_sid=fbb2abf34&_ss=r
Q: What do you get someone for Christmas when they have everything? What can you buy someone for Christmas that has everything?
A: Even the person who has everything knows that everything woke turns to sh*t. Get them a glass that says just that. The Grinch now has everything because his heart grew three sizes, and he loves this glass because he’s awake and not woke.
They know that everything woke turns to poo because they question everything. You could also get them our Question Everything glass.
Even though 2022 isn’t the year this country can enjoy the gift of a new president, hopefully we’ll all get that soon. Good luck with your Christmas shopping; we hope we’ve helped you check more than a few items off your list. And because we aren’t buying that politically correct speech BS, everyone at Patriot’s Cave would like to wish you a Merry Christmas!
